Progress Post 3

So I really like my skin care products, but I would like to give it a full month before I give it a review. Just to see how much of a difference they make. It is definitely worth a try to go the all-natural route. There are so many different shops on Etsy. I bought mine from BearsBeauty. I have nothing but good things to say about the owner Jerra. She is just awesome at creating a routine for you and really will help you with whatever you need. She is very knowledgeable and has experience with dermatillomania.

Anyway, back to my progress. I tried the fake nails and they really did help.  If anything they made me more aware of what I was doing in the moment. Unfortunately, I did an at home kits and had to take them off after a few days since I felt like they weren’t put on good enough. I am thinking about getting them done at a salon, but I hate to pay that price and I worry about how well they clean their tools.

Still struggle with the mornings, but it seems to be a bit better. I just keep trying to keep telling myself that more harm than anything becomes of me touching my face. But easier said than done, right?

I am looking into an all-natural minerals makeup. I’ve narrowed it done to either meow cosmetics or Lucy minerals. I think that making the switch would be overall better for my skin. I am a bit apprehensive because I need full coverage.

  

Progress Post 2+

I guess I feel like I need to post again or at least type something out to reflect on my feelings. Yesterday I received a bunch of all natural products from Etsy. I have been anxiously waiting for them to arrive. Although I shouldn’t expect miracle, I hate to admit I may have high hopes. (More on the products on a later post) I started right away and I am apprehensive that there will be an initial purge. But after doing some research, I should not have a purge since I’m not using any chemicals. But..after trying a couple products last night and this morning, I am breaking out more.

Is it that I am more paranoid of it to work or did touching my face with the product make it work? Or am I just too impatient? Probably impatient…

So this morning was not good. It’s like I was so engrossed on if my face was smooth. I even put on another mask to avoid touching my face. It certainly helped in the moment, but then I wonder if that was bad for my skin since you are only supposed to do it a couple times a week. AHHHHH

My husband says I’m making it (the look of my face) seem much worse than it actually is. I hope he is right. I need to give these products a chance and I really want them to improve my acne, but I need to not touch my face either!

Side note: I stumbled upon this cool website http://cosdna.com/ You can type in ingredients and products and it gives you ratings on how lightly it will irritate you.

Progress Post 2

I guess I was hoping by now, someone would respond to my blog. I feel that having someone that you can relate to have a great impact on the success of recovery in something like skin picking. It is rare that someone can understand the urges and temptations we are faced with on a daily level. It is NOT easy to just all of a sudden stop picking.

But….I started this blog for myself and need to keep that in mind. It is for me to become accountable and self-reflect. If I reach someone, that is just an added benefit.

As far as progress goes from last week, I still struggle in the mornings with leaving my face alone. Although I feel like I have made progress as a whole, I am not satisfied. Maybe I expect too much too soon.

I have also been thinking about getting fake nails. I consider myself a frugal person, so I’m not really a fan of the idea. Nor do I feel like I’m the type of person that “goes to get her nails done.” I suppose the benefit might be worth it though…

Progress Post 1

So I said I would post weekly, so here I go. Things got a bit rough last week as far as my face picking goes. I was utterly disgusted with how it looks. But I am happy to report I am now on the upswing. I really think one of the products I was using could have been making my acne worse. More on the products I am using in a different post.

I recently started using a microfiber wash cloth at night to take my makeup off. This helps in that I am not feeling my face again for things to pick. Yay! It’s always nice when you find something that really prevents you from picking, even if it is minor.

My night time picking is also considerably down since I now give myself only 10 minutes in the bathroom at night to shower and get ready for bed. It is the morning that I continue to struggle with. I’m always the first one up and I don’t have any makeup on either which doesn’t help. I don’t want to put on makeup that early cause what makeup lasts more than 12 hours… I definitely need to work on that….

The MIRROR

The mirror is my worst enemy!  I know I am not the only one that feels that way. Currently, I only have one mirror in the house. It is a full length mirror on the back of my bedroom door in poor light. It is only to be used to put on makeup. If my husband is home and need to use the mirror, he would know since the door would be closed.

I have gotten rid of all the mirrors that come with makeup as well as all the bathroom mirrors. If someone asks why there isn’t a mirror in the bathroom, I tell them it broke. Of course, I have found ways to cheat (ex: car mirror), but I have found myself to be more conscious of what I am doing and hopefully remind myself that it’s not worth it.

So my advice: Get rid of the mirrors! Since you are not your skin picking, you are not your face either. You are so much more than outside appearances. 

My husband

My husband is truly one of kind. He is so understanding and supportive. If I want to talk about how bad my face is, he will listen. If I want to try a new product, he never says no. If I need him to sit in the bathroom with me so I don’t pick, he will. No matter how many break downs I have be it in a day, week, or month, he is there giving me a hug encouraging me to keep trying. He loves me unconditionally. He tells me how beautiful I am and when he looks at my face he doesn’t see all the red marks and pimples like I do. He is probably one of the reasons I don’t go into a deep depression. How can I have been so lucky to have this man in my life? He is truly my best friend and understands me more than I understand myself. This is why it truly breaks my heart that I cannot break this awful cycle of picking my face.

 Why isn’t this enough motivation for me?

My Skin Picking Journey

I have picking at my face for as long as I can remember. I know I would see my mom pick/pop her pimples, so I suppose you could say that’s where I learned it from. But she is nowhere near the picker I am.

I would say, my skin picking starting to get worse during and after college. In high school, I was treated for Anorexia and later diagnosed with OCD. I was on meds in high school and college. I still continue to struggle with being obsessed with food and being healthy. It does not consume my life though.

One could make an assumption that as I became less obsessed with food my skin picking got worse…maybe… I also contribute it to being worried, stressed or being at home more. I just think there is not one answer to something like this.

I have tried many attempts at beating this and have failed many times. My hope is to share what I have realized and offer advice for others like me.

Am I free of picking? Absolutely not. My goal for this blog is to get others to share their progress and be each other’s support. In my experience, you need someone that can understand what you are going through and keep you optimistic.

Here are some things that I would like to cover in upcoming blog entries:

• Therapy
• The dreaded mirror
• Support
• Fidget Toys
• Journaling
• Pictures
• Makeup
• Face Products
• Helpful blogs/ You Tube videos

Join me on this journey of holding ourselves accountable and strive for a better you. 

I will be posting weekly check-ins where I will share my progress. In addition, I will be posting biweekly topics that pertain to skin picking. I welcome any suggestions and comments.

Let’s start by giving a short summary of you:

• Your age
• When you started picking
• What you like to do for fun
• One more sentence if you’d like to share anything else
• We’ll keep intros short